If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
After tacos, we're chasing women.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I see more hoeing in ur future
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