Buhtt sex?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
