i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Randomize
