You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
