is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Randomize