Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
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i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
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I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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