It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
