every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
