Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
It's rum buckets o'clock
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
