There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
