Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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