Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
