I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
