i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize