But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
