I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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