I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize