Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
