(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Randomize
