the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
