Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
