do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
look no pants
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
