I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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