hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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