Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize