we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
