I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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