Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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