Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
