not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Couch. On fire.
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