if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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