Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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