): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
