So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
