its not stalking. its research.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
