I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
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