If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
