just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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