If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Randomize
