Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
