I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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