Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this

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  (810): I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room (810): Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this http://tfl.nu/ax0d
  Replies (2) Good night (734) Bad night (1508)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.

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  (770): i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles. http://tfl.nu/d3lp
  Replies (7) Good night (2879) Bad night (1193)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night

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  (715): sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night http://tfl.nu/ih63
  Replies (5) Good night (4585) Bad night (721)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking

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  (804): I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking http://tfl.nu/lx04
  Replies (18) Good night (4485) Bad night (1377)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.

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  (540): Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps. http://tfl.nu/aqjz
  Replies (5) Good night (1000) Bad night (6168)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts

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  (630): btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts http://tfl.nu/hxut
  Replies (4) Good night (3723) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.

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  (765): I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro. http://tfl.nu/6pjm
  Replies (10) Good night (3226) Bad night (720)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.

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  (408): I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER. http://tfl.nu/adi1
  Replies (7) Good night (1398) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety

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  (931): Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety http://tfl.nu/hne4
  Replies (5) Good night (941) Bad night (544)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.

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  (813): Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich. http://tfl.nu/j6pr
  Replies (10) Good night (1685) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME

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  (706): I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME http://tfl.nu/20fj
  Replies (18) Good night (1509) Bad night (773)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.

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  (412): Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it. http://tfl.nu/10d1
  Replies (6) Good night (1077) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week

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  (+44): Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week http://tfl.nu/qjgk
  Replies (2) Good night (482) Bad night (406)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?

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  (610): How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too? http://tfl.nu/27f3
  Replies (2) Good night (191) Bad night (408)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.

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  (219): If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life. http://tfl.nu/39kr
  Replies (6) Good night (1000) Bad night (269)

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