in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
