Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
