problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize