Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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