whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize