apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
we should paint friendship bongs
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