Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
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