I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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