Got a toothbrush?
Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
