She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize